It begins!

It's been a long time since I last blogged. I believe I was bitching about the mormons, over myspace. Oh, those crazy, crazy mormons... Anywho, welcome one and all, to the Double Standard. That's right, the Double Standard. Some of you may be wondering what I'll be posting in the Double Standard (yes, I know I've typed it out 3 times, but I totally love the title). Well, for the most part, I will use this to bitch about all the little things that bug me (people who don't tip, people who post song lyrics over facebook constantly, women drivers, that sort of thing), or post all of my crazy theories (gravity is a farce, aliens exist, and there's a ghost in the basement of River City). Every once in a while, I may decide to take the sentamentalist route, also (I love you guys!, I'm so depressed right now., or the ever popular, I'm so pissed at _____.) Of course, I'm also not big on "structure" or "planning", so my blogs could go any-which-way. Like Lost, it'll keep you guessing, and probably leave you disappointed at the end (which is also reminiscent of most people's first sexual experience... I just solved the mystery of the island!).

So, to kick things off, let's talk about blogging. That's right, I'm going to write a blog about how ridiculous and stupid blogging is. (See? The Double Standard makes sense!) In all fairness, not all blogs are awful- every so often there is that single, beautiful diamond in the ruff (like this one! or not...). And by ruff I mean heartbroken teenagers, disenchanted housewives, goth poems, faux song lyrics, and other terribly boring subjects (really? your boyfriend dumped you and now you're sad? i really don't give a fuck... or, wow, you write beautifully about killing yourself. why not just get it over with already?). Am I a terrible person for thinking this way? Possibly, but I'm also an honest one (at the moment, anyway).

The thing about blogs are they're for people who want attention (myself included, though I hardly think I need to clarify that). Sure, some people will argue that the writing is theraputic, and they may be right, but you don't need the internet to write. Journals do the exact same thing, and are much, much more private. Blogs are for people who want other people to think they're special, without actually saying that. "Wow, you write so beautifully!" or "You're so creative!" or other such emotionless drivel is usually handed out to appease someone else, while hoping you will, in turn, be commented on. And if you're not commented on, well, that's just more angsty fuel for your next gem, no?

I can already hear the screams of protest. "MY blog IS different!", which really translates into, "I'M really different! I really AM special!" Chances are, you're not. Not to everyone, anyway. Maybe you have a group of loyal readers, or friends, who read all your new blogs. Maybe you don't. Does that make you special? I think not, my dears. Then again, who am I to make that judgement? Who am I to take away the one thing that makes you special?

The Oracle of Delphi was supposedly chosen by the Gods to tell people the future. From near and far, people would go to the Oracle for advice, both commoners and kings. I chose the penname Delphi because I want to fill that role. I want to be special, I want to be revered, and I want to be right. Is that fair? Do I have that right, after putting down so many others?

...Well, I suppose that's the double standard.